Insecurities.

Insecurities are a funny thing. Think about the things that make you feel insecure? Perhaps being alone or maybe being put in charge or something. Maybe you feel insecure when you are in a larger group of people or meeting a new person for the first time. Perhaps technology in and of itself can make you feel insecure.

For me, my biggest insecurities come not so much when I am alone, but more so when I feel alone, because there is a big difference. Some nights I come home from work and I don't want to talk on the phone or get on the internet, I just want to be by myself and alone in my room. Quiet, contemplative and peaceful. Other times I come home from work, or more often so on my days off and I just want to be near a friend or hear their voice. It's times like this that my insecurities start to creep in. What if they aren't calling me back because they don't like me? What if they are planning something and I am not going to be invited or involved? What if they are talking about me behind my back? What if...what if... what if...

I spend so much of my time feeling that I have to please everyone. But... very little of my time is spent trying to please the One that truly matters, God. I suppose this is true of very many Christians today... because of our fast paced society and technology, we often forget God in everything. But it's in the times I feel insecure and unsure of myself that if I stop and just listen, I don't hear God whispering "I Love You"... I hear Him doing everything but showing up "in person" to tell me. He's screaming it with the birds in the skies singing, whispering it in the gentle breeze, repeating it with a soft summer shower, and singing it like the warm sunshine on my face. It's so beautiful it makes me cry sometimes. God loves me... no matter how insecure or alone I feel, I am never alone because He is always right there with me.

I hardly remember a time in my life that I have felt so alive as I do in this very moment. Just the amount of love I have felt from God today... how clear His voice has been in my life... It's beautiful.

My prayer for you today is that you would also feel the love of God... that you would embrace every single second of it, and hold on to it for dear life. God's love is the best kind of love, it's unfailing, always true and isn't conditional. Let God love you... let God cover your insecurities... In the areas you and I are weakest, He is strong! So take hold of that today and throughout the course of your life. Remember who you are and whose you are.

Jess